Chapter 61: Just Call Me Jeeves

Saturday morning, Jon called me early. Well, early for me. At 7am, my phone started singing "We Are The Champions". I still have to thank David for changing my ringtone. NOT. I grumped "What?" into the phone then cracked an eye to look at the clock. Jesus. A little over three hours' sleep. Ang was already out of bed, but I was on her pillow. Guess I cuddled up to her last night.

"Morning, Jeeves!" Jon said cheerfully.

"Have you had coffee already? Why are you so goddamned chipper?"

"Darlin', it's Saturday, and there is a lot to do." His voice was so damned happy, I wanted to slaughter him. "I need you," he said. "Get your ass over to the hotel by 8, and meet me in the gym."

"In the gym?" I squeaked.

"Yep. I need someone to keep me company, and I can give you the rundown of your day. Wear comfortable clothes and shoes, you're gonna need them. Oh, and pick up a case of that water I like; the hotel doesn't stock it."

I sighed. "Yeah, boss," I said, without thinking.

"What did you call me?"

I don't know, what did I say? "Uh, 'boss'? It's what I call my boss at work when he's demanding. Why? You really want the royal highness bit?"

"Nah, 'boss' is good. Maybe I'll have the guys call me that, too."

I snorted in a most unladylike fashion. "Good luck with that."

"8am, Jeeves," he said, and clicked off.

"FUCK!" I yelled then headed for the shower.

Ten minutes later (yeah, I can move when I want to) I was sitting in the kitchen having half a cup of Queenie's wonderful coffee. I didn't want to overdo on the caffeine because of LJ, but needed a little kick.

The shower had helped wake me up, and I have to say, if I told any of my girlfriends at home I was spending the day with Jon Bon Jovi, doing whatever he asked of me (I'll tell them later, when they ask how my trip was), they'd gladly sell their souls to trade places with me. I tried to keep that in the back of my mind, but to me, it's just Pain-In-The-Ass-Jon. Huh. Guess I do think of him as just a regular guy now.

While I was finishing the wake-up process, Ang came back in. That crazy bitch had been out running!

"What’s a matter, Hath, Jon bringing it?" I gave Ang a look that would have melted my minions, but she just laughed at me. "Oh and I’m gonna re nickname you Limpet." I looked at her sideways. "Girl, you were all over me last night."

I laughed. "I’ll be sure to tell David that later," I said, winking at her.

"Cuddler,” she muttered. “Hell woman I’m surprised I’m still alive!"

"I told you so," I called to her as she headed for the shower. "Hey!" Ang turned. "Put your shit together for tonight; I'm gonna drop it off in D's room on my way to service Jon." She laughed and waved and continued down the hall. I sighed and stood. "Well, I'm off. Let's get your stuff into the car."

Each lady had their stuff ready for the concert assembled into bags. We loaded them and nearly all my stuff into the Taurus (my bowling outfit I left in Lucy’s closet), and I aimed it for the hotel.

When I finally pulled up in front of the hotel, I took a deep breath. The bellhop loaded my bags and a case of water onto a dolly, and I took my ticket from the valet. I spoke with the head of valet and the concierge, and explained that I was Jon’s new personal assistant, and needed their contact information. I loaded it onto my Blackberry. I also got the numbers of the kitchen manager, the gym, and front desk loaded up. I was determined to be prepared for anything. Hell, maybe I could really quit my job and work for Jon. Naaah. He’d fire me inside a month.

I led the bellhop up to David’s suite. Pressing a finger to my lips outside his door, I whispered, “He’s still asleep.” We crept into the room and he followed me into the bedroom, and the kid dropped his jaw when he saw who was sleeping in the bed. I must say, my jaw dropped too, but for a purely lustful reason. He was sleeping topless, probably bottomless too, and the thought of that made my heart pound. I remembered the kid, though, and led him back to the living area. “Are all the rooms up here suites?”

The kid nodded. “Yes. They all have a bedroom, living area, and stocked kitchenette.”

Kitchenette? Shit.

I slipped the kid a twenty and he left the water on the desk as I had asked him. He mouthed “thank you” then backed quietly out of the room, bringing the cart with him.

I checked my watch. About six minutes till eight. I went back into the bedroom and grabbed David’s phone from the nightstand. I set the alarm for 8:05. Then I set the clock radio for 8:06, and the alarm on the TV in the living room for 8:07, the stove for 14 minutes from now, and the microwave 15 minutes. Fuck with my ring tones, will you? I ran back and sat on the edge of the bed for a minute and bent down to kiss him gently on the lips. He smiled and shifted, but didn’t wake up. I lifted the sheets; yep, commando in there. I consulted my watch again; I was out of time. Regretfully I dropped the covers and crept from the suite, grabbing the water on the way out.

I slapped the 'up' button for the elevator, and grabbed the hand rail when I got inside. I angrily punched the button for the 34th floor – goddamnit, why have the gym on the TOP level of the hotel? When I got there, I noticed I had a minute to spare, and I peeked in the window. Jon was stretching, and kept glancing at the clock. At eight on the dot, he had just stepped onto the treadmill, and I breezed through the door, and dropped the water onto the nearest weight bench.

“Hey, boss,” I said.

“Jeeves,” he said seriously, nodding. He’d gotten off the machine and come over to where I was standing. He grinned at the water. “Found my brand then, did you?”

“I did,” I assured him.

“And is it cold?” he asked me, smirking. I was ready for this one.

I tossed him a cold bottle, which he opened and started to slug back. “Only half of it,” I said, surprising him. “Because I know it isn’t good to drink exceedingly cold water after a workout. I bought some cold, some room temperature.”

“Very good, Jeeves,” he said, finishing the water and tossing the empty back at me, and I gave a little mock half-bow. He looked me over. I was dressed comfortably, if not casually, in skin-tight blue jeans (that were almost uncomfortably snug but not quite), a black tank (girls firmly slung, thank you very much), and cropped red hoodie. I had my hair in a high pony, and my trusty Reeboks. I looked about twelve. “Is that,” he waved at me, “comfortable?”

“Don’t you worry yourself about my comfort, boss,” I said. “I’ll be fine.”

He wouldn’t give it up. “You don’t look like you can do much in those jeans,” he said.

I sighed impatiently and scanned the room. Spying a heavy bag suspended from the ceiling, I stalked to it. After jabbing it a couple times, I executed a beautiful spinning roundhouse kick, and sent the thing to jangling on its chains. When it swung back toward me, I dropped to the floor, and rolled underneath it, stopping its swing by scissoring it with my legs. I rolled out from under the bag, did a few pushups, and walked my feet in until I was bent in half. I won’t be able to do that much longer. I kicked my legs up to do a handstand, then dropped into a tuck and roll, and stood up, brushing my palms.

“Are you gonna come up with anything that requires more flexibility than that?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Naah,” he said, trying to hide his surprise. “That should be fine.” He stalked to the treadmill.

Good flunky that I am, I grabbed a bottle of room-temp water, brought it to Jon, took a notebook and pen from my bag, and dropped gracefully to sit cross-legged on the floor.

“Ready when you are, boss,” I said, though I was anything but.

As he fired up the treadmill, he started in on all the shit he wanted me to do with him today, including breakfast.

"First," he told me, "I want M&Ms in a bowl in my dressing room, but I only like the blue ones. So, I want you to go out and get several bags of them and pick out enough blue ones to fill up the bowl."

I rolled my eyes at him, but wasn’t going to say one thing. This is what the bet was, and I was just going to take whatever he dished out.

"Second,” he said, “the guitar strap on my favorite guitar is wearing thin on one end. I need you to take it somewhere to get it fixed; it's in my room and I'll get it for you later. Third, I've ordered Sam's wedding gift and I need you to pick it up. It’s antique diamond hair pins for her to wear at the wedding. I've already gotten directions to the shop, and I'll give 'em to you. Can't have you getting lost and not be able to get back to the arena in time, because I also want you to work with Tony today. We're short a tech, so you need to get with Tony; he's got stuff for you to do. I gave him a list of the things I thought you could handle." He paused, and I knew he was waiting for me to bitch at him. Nope, wasn’t going to happen. I was making notes, and the last thing he said had me skipping the pen right off the end of the page. "But, right now, I'm hungry. So, I'm ready for breakfast." He stopped the treadmill and stepped off of it.

I threw him a towel and another room-temp bottle of water without thinking twice. “What?” I said.

“You heard me.” He chugged back his water, grabbed his bag and motioned me to follow. He had grabbed the rest of the case of water too, not wanting me to carry it. How the hell did he think it got down here? Oblivious to my reaction, he said, “I want a Denver omelet, dry wheat toast, fried potatoes, fresh juice and coffee, and I want you to make it for me. The fridge in the suite is stocked.”

I sighed. “I gotta stop off at David’s room first,” I said, “but I’ll go with you to your room and get your key and I’ll get started when I get there.”

Jon hesitated but agreed.

“Relax,” I said. “You’re safe; I was never a Jonny girl.” I flounced ahead of him to ring for the elevator while he sputtered at me. I laughed and looked over my shoulder and stuck my tongue out at him.

“Bitch!” he said, laughing at me.

“And you say that like it’s a bad thing, sweetheart.” I just shook my head at him.

When we got to their floor, Jon said, “Don’t be too long.” He strode to his room, opened the door, and flipped me his keycard. I saluted and walked down the hall to David’s suite. I let myself in, and he was sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and looking miserable.

“What’s wrong, baby?” I said.

“One of the guys got in here and fucked with my alarm clocks,” he said with a big yawn.

I started laughing. “Oh, like the way someone fucked with my ring tones?” I said sweetly, and the light bulb came on.

“That was you?” His eyes widened. “That was annoying!”

“Wasn’t it just?” On cue, my phone rang Jon’s tone. “Yeah boss,” I said into the phone. I laughed. “No worries, boss. Be there in ten.” I hung up and looked at David. “He said we don’t have time to mess around, that he’s hungry and wants his breakfast.” I rolled my eyes at him. “But, I just wanted to stop in and say good morning and to ask you if all six alarms went off yet. Gotta run baby, talk to you later! Love you!" and I bolted for the door.

“What?” David said, jumping up. Only five had sounded.

Laughing, I left the room.